Turning 25: Excitement or Frustration?

As my 25th birthday approaches, I have been asking myself: Am I really ready to be an ADULT?

As my 25th birthday approaches, I have been asking myself: Am I really ready to be an ADULT? I mean, that’s some serious conversation to have with yourself, ready or not, s**t is about to get real! I looked into a few articles and old sayings about reaching the quarter of century milestone and found out about the “Quarter-Life Crisis.” So according to this article, it is completely normal for me to doubt my abilities to succeed as an adult and that made me feel a little better…


Here are 25 life lessons I have learned before turning 25:

  1. Learning how to let go because I am a control-freak and I do not like surprises – unless they come in a beautifully wrapped package or rhyme with unlimited credit card! 🙂
  2. I am my worst enemy. I was raised to be a perfectionist, a competitor, an overachiever and, failure was never an option. I tend to forget that I am only human and mistakes and disappointments are also part of growing up.
  3. Learning how to say no to my loved ones was eye-opening. Blame it on my Libra sign, we don’t like conflict, although we make good diplomats, we will dismiss ourselves from such situations.
  4. Being selfless and forgetting to care for me first. I would go out of my ways for the people I care about, regardless of whether it is reciprocal.
  5. Not everybody will be happy about your success and that is okay. I have learned how not to take it personally at occasions and, to call some people out on their BS because honestly: Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That!
  6. It’s okay not to be ok because life is a b***h and crush us sometimes. I had to face my insecurities and to battle my fear of deceiving my entourage and I guess that is something we all have in common.
  7. People grow apart, relationships fail and that’s just life. People will come and go, become strangers to each others and though it sucks, it happens. Learn the lesson and move on.
  8. Be more patient. When I want something, I want it now and thank to my partner who is a constant reminder that rushing and jumping to conclusions only brings worry.
  9. Less is more – meaning that not every major event in your life deserves public attention. Learning what to say and to whom is crucial and sometimes people don’t care as much as you do.
  10. Trust your guts, always! You know yourself better than anyone else so when something feels or looks weird, listen. You might not see it now but soon enough you’ll be swamped by “what ifs.”
  11. The person you are madly in love right now might not be the one you will spend the rest of your life with.
  12. Holding grudges is unhealthy and only causes heartaches, even though I still struggle with this myself, but I constantly remind myself that it is not worth the drama and sleepless nights.
  13. Compulsive shopping is only a short-term solution. Either you have a Carrie Bradshaw walk-in closet or you have a credit card that never says no (lucky you).
  14. Multi-tasking will save your life. Seriously. It is almost impossible today to juggle between school, work, exercising and having a social life if you have poor time-management skills.
  15. Travel! Whenever you have the opportunity, please do it! This is the moment in your life when you want to be adventurous and discover foreign territories – even if that means going to another state or backpacking in Southeast Asia – it will change your conception of society.
  16. Collect timeless pieces. It could be art, jewellery, shoes & bags, vinyls or even furniture. You can pass it on to your children or grand-children and you get to brag about it to your friends! 🙂
  17. Exercise. I never thought how important it was until I integrated into my routine. Working out has helped me release my stress, anxiety, depression and rediscover what my body was capable of. It doesn’t matter what level you’re on, the goal is to learn how to listen to your body and honestly, who doesn’t want a great butt?
  18. Listen to your mom. Growing up, I’ve always been closer to my father because that was just the dynamics in my family. As I grew older, I realized that she was the most resourceful person in my life and that I almost always needed her opinion on every major decisions I made. Don’t get it wrong, I am very close to both of my parents but a mother-daughter has no comparison!
  19. Know who your core friends are and keep them close. These are the one to recognize the signs when something is wrong before you even pick up the phone. You don’t need to talk everyday but somehow, you always find your way back. It’s like home.
  20. Keep a journal of your thoughts, ideas and review them regularly. I always find it interesting to read old notes because they really show how much I have changed in only  a few years. 
  21. Know the difference between privacy and secrecy. You have the right to your secret garden; that doesn’t mean you are hiding stuff from your partner, family or friends.
  22. Going natural is not an easy process! When I decided to stop relaxing my hair, obviously I knew it would take some time getting used to it. Who like stepping out of their comfort zone? No one! However, it definitely taught me how to be more accepting of my natural features.
  23. Life is not a race but a journey to be savored each step of the way. Stop comparing yourself to others or trying to fit into a model set by your parents or family. You will set yourself for failure, frustration and expensive therapist sessions!
  24. Develop a spiritual relationship. Religion has always had a great role in my life and kept me grounded. My faith helped me overcome a number of obstacles I never thought I could at times. 
  25. There is always room for improvement, as long as you allow it. Don’t stay fixated on mistakes or actions from the past but instead, look forward and learn from them. Nobody said you had to get it right on the first try and, even if you do, you can always do better! At least, that’s what I tell myself.


Author: Blurred-Heritage

Not just another child of the Congolese diaspora lost in America. More like a highly educated young woman, wife and mother with dreams bigger than this world and, an heritage as blurred as the borders of my continent. Welcome to Blurred-Heritage. I am Isis and if you like what you read and see, subscribe or share ! Bonne visite !

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